back again

it's almost time for POP. "POP loh!!!!" and it feels like an eternity that i haven't made a blog entry. wow i'm writing again. to use vocabulary and string them together in a gramatically correct sentence. i'm losing it. as i said, SAF screws up your vocabulary. they take out elegant words, conjectures, and expressions, replacing them with "fuck", and the variant forms of this highly versatile little four-letter word.

so how's BMT u may ask? well... don't feel like discussing it. but i guess i'm compelled to, owing that it defines and predominates the past 11 weeks of my measly existence. in BMT, i'm a blur cock. yup. it's a persona. if u do something long and frequent enough, people expect you to do it. you're reduced to a series of expectations, characteristics and cliches. till it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. but i have only myself to blame.

ok la it's actually quite fun. field camps create lasting memories of endearing powder baths (and the charming ease-spring and check clear) and heartfelt talk cock sessions under the moon and starlight. IPPT is always a pain, and i cna't jump for fuck. 185cm. it's 216 to pass. i hate arti, sniper, and casevec drills. but then again, who doesn't? i actually find route marches quite fun. why? cos we get to sing whatever we want. it's a chance for my pathetic exhibitionistic self to get some of my bathroom singing out for human ears to cringe upon. it gives me a kick. and sometimes my platoon mates sing along as well. hah.

but i have something to prove. that the SAF does not define me. i will not talk only about that. tho sometimes it seems the thing easiest to talk about. but i have a life outside SAF ok... owever miniscule it may be. even things as simple as writing this blog gives me a precious opportunity to whip out and wipe the dust of my much unused stash of vocab. so yeah. i will not be doninated by the army. i will not lose myself.

sceptical? well i read. been reading roald dahl short stories. switch bitch is a cool book. it's all about sex. it's dark and funny. uncle oswald is really cool. the triumph of roald dahl is his sublime ability to paint a vivid picture of a highly unique, gripping and unexpected character. Mr Botibol, Georgy Porgy, Uncle Oswald are one of the more memorable ones. i also read... graphic novels! no i'm not gonna talk about V for Vendetta any more. It's sandman this time. i borrowed fables and reflections. I thought the most meaningful story is "three septembers and a january". i was really touched when i read the ending. it's about knowing who you are, being true to who you are, character, and integrity. sounds like a bore? read it first, then judge.

tmr is 'A' level results.... it's the last moment in bargo, in limbo, in the state of being both alive and dead (i make reference to Schrodinger's Cat). tmr, the uncertainty will be resolved, the tossed coin will land, the fate cast in stone. ok, that's enough analogies.

ok. wish me luck. i'll pray. of course. for A level as well as IPPT.