i'm feeling random today

i'm feeling random today so i'll say some random stuff.

1. in yesterday's newspaper, i saw a quote from lindsey lohan. she said "I used to date a guy who kept calling me 'kid'--I hated it. I've been thru more than many pple have in lifetimes" wa lau. she's dam childish. i mean i liked some of her earlier movies but now she just sucks.

2. was walking home from my braces dentist today. there's this really sleazy place in lucky plaza that i have to pass to reach the mrt. it's called house of condom. so it sells like all those sex toys etc. then i saw a 50 plus year old couple stepping out of it holding hands. yuck. but heh at least they're trying to spice up the marraige. yuck. let me go puke now.

3. ok i'm back. there's a dammmm funny article in the newspaper today abt soccer players. it goes like a dictionary kind of definitions. hahahahahaha. my kind of humour. (btw that's how the queen spells humor, americans). here are some qoutes:

RONALDO
If u take it in the Brazilian context it means "fat person". As in "Eat too much and u'll become a Ronaldo". In Portugese context, it means "betrayal" or "traitor", usually refers to someone who stabs someone in the back by acting unsportingly. Historically, the English hardly use this word, however, they have an equivalent--"Bastard".

BECKHAM
A "Beckham" is a true English word.It's a word that can even bring tears to a glass eye because it's origin is so touching. A long time ago, there was an English prince, very handsome, not too bright, hapily married to a queen of shopping, who was very emotional whenever he fought for engalnd. This prince cried very often because evrytime he put on his battle gear, he got very emotional. This story has been used to inspire english achoolchildrin throughout the ages.
Usage: "you are so patriotic. One day, u'll be the Beckham of Singapore."

BALLACK
A Ballack is the German equivalent of Beackham, only if u r described as one, u wouldn't have cried so much. Since in German, it involves a certain degree of pain and angst. Describes sacrifice and struggle.

High Ballack: extreme pain, hobbling during football match.
Low Ballack: helpless suspension, where u sit out a game thru injury.

Usage: "your Ballack inspired us to push thru, and topple the regime that has dominated us for 50 years."

ERIKSSON
Can be used in many ways. It's so versatile that pple havr used it to descibe a depressed feeling, a hopeless state of mind, a sense of impotence, and a sense of no importance.

Usages for:

"boring": "I fell asleep in class today bcos Mrs Tan gave an Eriksson."
a sexual term: "U r such an Eriksson I wouldn't sleep with u even if u're the last man on Earth."
as an epithet: "Get away from me! Erik***n you!"

Ya. these r from an article my Tay Yek Keak for Life!

4. about asian guys: u know my grandpa never fails to surprise me. he's the typical asian JOhn Wayne--no affection, hard as a rock, and always pulling a long face. his famous quote: "Gua lasing you bettole bettole!" which is an amalgam of malay and english, and i'm not sure if there's some hokkien in there... it means "I'll whack u good good." haha. ok and whenever he walks with my grandma, he walks like 20 metres ahead of her, the quintessential asian gentlemanly way. and he always looks at his watch whenever grandma socialises with pple he couldn't care less for. (which like 80% of the pple she knows)
u get the picture.

but yesterday during a church thing, the priest was trying to make a point abt needing to trust those we love. so he asked my grandma to close her eyes and grandpa to lead her wherever he liked. I was thinking "oh crap... this is just gonna be one embarassing standoff. pls pls pls don't scold the priest..." but to my surprise, he sprang up from his seat, and yes, i use "sprang" in the most literal meaning of the word, as in "my crazy 69 year old grandad sprang like an excited kid" and grasped grandma tightly by the hand AND wrist, and led her all the way around, opening doors, leading her thru rooms all over, and smiling as he did so. and he led her back deftly. i think he was really enthusiastic about leading his darling wife who trusted him, even for a short moment.

so the priest asked her how she felt abt it, and she said (mind u, this is a woman who frequently refers to her husband as a "lousy peranakan barbarian"), she said "I feel safe when guided by a person i trust." amazing. granpa really impressed me yesterday. then of course, after mass he goes back to his usual routine of yelling to the priest how the comfort taxi drivers should get together and oppose the taxi price hike. lol.

but my point is, i guess even tho we've got more western, asian guys r like that. really terrified of betraying any feelings of affection whatsoever. so all u asian girls out there who're thinking of ditching your asian dude for a more "open" western guy, remb that asian guys r actually full of love, just needs the right situation to bring it out. it's kind of like a beauty and the beast kind of story, the womans affection and patience brings out the best in a hardened man... and in moments like this when it happens, it's really beautiful la, i must say.

and really, i think a lot of times, ang mo guys r just gimmicky. all the roses n chocolates and "soulmate" and "i will die for u"... it's nice la, but gets kinda lame if used alot of times, and many times, it's just bullshit. pardon my nationalistic feelings. heh. but a lot of them r nice also :) just to be politically correct. just can't stand asian girls who say they'll never go for asian guys... (no, that's not an excuse i got b4, in case ur wondering...)

haha. ok enough of my random rant.

kiss my ass.